Paris: Getting your papers to live here

Australians, Canadians and Americans don’t need a visa for a short visit in France or Europe. But all need a visa long séjour if wanting to stay longer than 3 months. This can be obtained in French embassies in your city and usually involves showing letters/papers attesting the purpose of your long stay in France and how you plan to finance it (and temporary work permit obtained by your employer in France if you intend to work for a French company). Once you obtained your visa long séjour don’t think that all is set and you can arrive in France and set up house. Nothing is further than the truth.

You will get introduced to French administration from the moment you go to the center where they receive foreigners (Centre de reception des étrangers which is your first point of starting the process after arrival) who would then give you an appointment time at the Prefecture to get your carte de séjour or residence permit (a card issued to everyone non-French living here temporarily or permanently). Prepare yourself to have papers that you might never have heard of (When I first arrived here, I had to get a fiche d’état civil. Luckily my embassy was able to provide a formal letter attesting my identity in place of). Copies of passport, electricity bill (as proof of residency (they ask for this for everything such as getting a bank account, getting a driver's licence etc. Obviously, we get the impression that homeless people should not exist though you see them more and more on the streets of Paris or under bridges), identity photos, letter from your employer and temporary or permanent work permit are the papers that might be asked (there might be more!). They will also look at your visa. You have a week after your arrival to get the process going. It might be a good idea to ask the immigration officer at the airport to stamp your passport with the arrival date, just in case. At airports, they often wave you without bothering to stamp passports, so ask.

And especially, prepare yourself for long lines and long wait at the prefecture. Your appointment may indeed be at 2 pm, but you may get called at 4 pm (and this after spending a long time in line to get into the building!). And of course, the agent who calls you and looks at your papers will find a missing paper that is obviously missing because it was not on the list given you by the other agent, but somehow, this missing document has become extremely important. Be prepared also to meet a lot of agents who are not the friendliest lot on earth. They have absolute power over your case, that much is clear, and they will let you know very clearly too. This is because the laws are numerous and very complicated which mean rarely clear and transparant which leave a lot of room for interpretations by the agents themselves. So if you happen to find yourself face to face with a constipated agent who woke up on the wrong side of the bed that morning, well, the law might suddenly becomes much more complicated too. I have been lucky here though, as I have mostly met the few nice and friendly agents. Luck of the draw I guess. That said, I have also had personnels who looked as if the last thing they wanted to do was be there and even less to be there talking to you.

Of course it helps a lot when you speak French well as many of these agents will use administrative lingos that may even leave French speakers baffled (not to mention the fact that certains types of documents do not exist in your country). Insist politely on clarification, as this will save you a lot of time even if this would tick the agent fruther (you probably get another person when you come back anyway). And be vigilant for small errors that the personnel may make such as misspelling your names! You may think this is not important, but it will be later on, trust me. And it may take a long time and a lot of time to fix it later despite it not being your fault!

If you don’t need to come back with another type of necessary document, you will be given a piece of paper that is your temporary card valid up to 3 months and will be notified by mail (snailmail of course) when your card is ready to be picked up. Depending on your situation, these cards could be for temporary residence valid anywhere up to a year, or the much coveted permanent card valid normally for ten years. The new law is that to get the residence card (permanent, I think) one needs to speak French and show integration to the French society.
Luckily, subsequent renewals can be done by post and you only need to go there to pick up your card.

My advice on this: Patience, patience and patience. Don’t ever loose your cool as this will only slow things further. Bring a good book and just wait for your turn. This is what the French have had to deal all their lives (the same process for getting a driving licence for instance), so think of it as your very own introduction to the infamously bureaucratic French administration experience.

Renting and bank account: the catch 22.
Having a residence (logement) is very important here as they will ask for proof of residence for any administrative process. If you rent an apartment, they will ask you for quittance de loyer (rent receipts) or the latest electricity bill. If you're living with a friend, he or she has to write a letter saying that you're indeed housed in their residence along with a copy of his or her identity card/passport. But, here's the catch (if you parachute into Paris all alone with no one to house you for the time being): to rent an apartment you have to have a bank account, but to open a bank account you have to have an address (and not a hotel). Well, this makes for an impossible situation to say the least.
The thing to do is to visit all the banks and ask if they could open an account for you. Different branches of a bank may apply the rule differently and you may get refused in one but can open an account with no problem in another branch. Once you open an account, you will have what is called a RIB or Relevé d'identitaire bancaire which is a piece of paper containing all your bank account information. This piece of paper will be asked when you wish to rent an apartment, to open an electricity account, and to have anything that involves payment. Now, you can start looking for that dream Paris apartment (see my blog on Renting in Paris).
Alternatively, you may get a residence first and get a bank account later. This can be achieved through short term rental, often of furnished apartments. There are real estate agents who deal often with foreigners and rent furnished apartments all around Paris. Though more expensive, they nonetheless provide the much needed starting point for foreigners coming to Paris. Most of these agents speak English, so that's a big help too when you still have to improve your French.

Paris: Gay/Tourist guide, sort of, of the 4e arrondissement

There are many tourist guides for Paris. So, I am just going to mention things that might reflect my personal opinions etc in addition to standard information if given. Arriving in Charles de Gaulle airport, be sure that you have filled out a disembarkation card (yellow) if you’re not a EU or French citizen. Prepare yourself for long and disorganized lines for passport control. Then prepare yourself for long waits for your bags. The airports do have ATMs though not always in the most visible places. So ask! Once you’re ready to get to the city, your options depending on your budget and luggage can either be the suburban train (RER), the city bus (non-stop and will take you to Opéra), the Air France bus (to Gare de Lyon and Montparnasse, or Invalides and Champs Elyssées, or yet another line directly to Orly airport). The RER will take you to Gare du Nord, Chatelet (smack in the center of Paris) or Saint Michel and Luxembourg on the southern side of the river Seine, near a huge and beautiful park known by the same name. On the same side of the river (known as Rive Gauche), you will find the known English bookstore Shakespeare (station Saint Michel). A good place to get information of where to stay for cheap if you did not plan ahead, which is not advisable unless you’re 17 and ready to crash anywhere or unless you have tons of money).

Where your hotel is
Where you stay in Paris can make a difference to your Parisian experience. Paris is divided into districts (or arrondissements) that spiral out of the center like a snail. Each district has its own characteristics and personality, so to speak (for the 4th , it’s gay and Jewish and touristy). In the center you have First arrondissement, the 2nd above it, the 3rd to the right of the 2nd, and the 4th below the third. The 5th arrodissement is below the 4th on the rive gauche. To the left is the 5th (where Sorbonne University used to be. These days it is composed of many universities, though the place de la Sorbonne still exists) followed by the 6th and the 7th as you move leftwards along the rive gauche. Traversing the Seine you have the 8th, 9th, and so on with the outer arrondissements straddling the inner ones moving in clockwise direction. In total there are 20 arrondissements in Paris. By the way, Parisians have clear images about Rive Gauche and Rive Droite (areas above or below the river Seine). If Rive Gauche evokes intellectualism and richness, Rive Droite evokes more socialism, excitement, and quartiers populaires (quarters for workers etc.) though bizarrely, les champs Elysées is on this side of the river along with all the grand monuments such as la Défense, Le Grand Palais etc.

The fourth arrondissement: Gay barsThe fourth arrondissement (75004) is probably where you want to be if you are gay. The Marais, in the 4th arrondissement is the gay area of Paris. Here, you should go to the gay bookshop Les mots à la bouche ( English books available here and all kind of guides), the Open Café on rue des Archives (a good place to meet locals and tourists alike in the evening and into the night) or the Cox bar almost next to it (a good place, slightly leather but not at all strictly, VERY popular late afternoon and early evening). Many of the places closed at 2 am though except for a few bars. The Quetzal (now called Happy Quetzal) is one of the late closing bars. It used to be very dingy and exciting (dark, dirty complete with a backroom upstairs). Changes have come in the closing of the backroom, and a recent renovation that unfortunately (in my opinion) make this place now resemble any other gay bars and at first glance even a showroom of IKEA. Still, the crowd, thankfully unchanged, makes it worth going there. The bathroom (upstairs) also is pretty cool (for example, the video mirrors above the sink…so whilst washing your hands you see a video of yourself rather than an image in the mirror). Mirrors everywhere in the toilet cubicle also make for an interesting experience! The other is le Raids which includes men taking showers as part of the ambiance (sort of like the Splash in NYC if indeed it’s still there, haven’t been back there for a while).

Bars along rue Vieille du Temple, rue des Archives et rue St. Croix de la Bretonnerie are all worth a look and a visit. Central Bar on rue vieille du temple is supposedly one of, if not the oldest gay bars in Paris and it also has a hotel upstairs (the only gay hotel in Paris officially). Other hotels abound in the district though not always cheap. Another option is the Hotel Loiret at, I love the street name, rue des mauvais garçons (literally, street of bad boys!). Near Central, you will also find l’Amnesia (the bar where I kissed my supposedly straight boyfriend for the first time in public. So it's special for me but apparently to many too as it is always crowded), and Okama. Old institutions that have been there forever include le Piano Zinc, les QG (leather/jeans bar with a backroom downstairs). Wonder around and you will find bars with different ambiances.

Restaurants
Restaurants abound as well. You might want to try the Gai Moulin which has a fixed menu that includes choices of entrée (what we call appetizers in the US), plat principal (entrée for Americans), and dessert or cheese. The ambiance is excellent. You sit very close to your neighbors and in all the times that I went there I have ended up chatting with those next to us (likely to be local gays or gay tourists). Try their oeuf cocotte for entrée. Next to the Quetzal there is a small Vietnamese restaurant that is very very popular with locals because not only are the prices reasonable but the food is also fresh and very good. It is small, so it is very crowded most of the time. You can also get food to take away here. For Jewish food (the 4th is also a jewish neighbourhood), go to rue Rosiers and get Falafel in the number of restaurants lining the street. Cakes also abound with many traditional Jewish bakeries.

Sex clubsMoving towards the 1st from the 4th district via rue des Lombards, you will find more bars (including a bears’ bar called the Den, as you approach boulevard de Sebastopol that separates the first and the fourth districts). Continuing on Lombards street, you will find yourself near Les Halles. In this hood, you will find Banana Café, a well known institution if a bit touristy but nonetheless gay (mixed actually, so you can bring girlfriends) bar. Going up boulevard de Sebastopol, you will also find a cruising club at rue aux ours (le Depot). This place is huge and if you want meat market this is exactly it. The bar is on the first floor while the cruising areas with cubicles etc are on the floor below. For the other cruising club in the 4th, you have to go towards the Seine (at Quai de l’Hotel de Ville) and find a place called Le Deep (!! Easily found by the two lion statues guarding the entrance which is a plain door illuminated by a spotlight).

If you must: real touristy stuffIn the fourth arrondissement, you will also find the Hotel de Ville de Paris (Paris Town Hall), an imposing building built in the 18th century. What I like about this building is the small statues of famous people that one finds all around the outside walls of the building. These include famous painters, philosophers, writers and thus not only political people! (Moliere, for instance) That’s great I think. Each district of Paris also has its own town-hall. For the 4th, the town-hall (or Mairie) is two steps from the Hotel de Ville de Paris though of course a lot less imposing than the latter. In the place in front of the Mairie (town-hall) of the 4th, there is an open market for vegetables, cheese, fish and meat and cooked meals such as Paella and French dishes ready to consume. Notre Dame, located on the island Cité (Ile de la Cité), is also in the 4th arrondissement. Did you know that the open place in front of Notre Dame is the point zero from where all the distances in France are calculated (in km)? Museum Picasso is also in this district. And one that you should also visit is the Museum for Photography, near the metro station St. Paul. They have great exhibitions there. But, of course, the Museum of Modern Art, George Pompidou is in this district too.

Having been a resident for the past 9 years in the 4th arrondissement, to my extreme dismay, I have seen traditional Parisian coffee shops disappeared and replaced by modern looking (San Francisco or Sydney style) coffee shops. Oh well, times they are a changing. You can still find more or less traditional coffee shops at Place de la Mairie near the town hall, or if you go further up on the streets Archive, Temple etc. Le pick clop, a café, on rue Vieille du Temple, I like very much because it has not changed much and retained its 70s ambiance somewhat, sort of like a combo of Marilyn Monroe and Paris traditional (that is, if Marilyn was to open a traditional café, it would probably look like this). Another favourite of mine is the Café Beaubourg in front of the George Pompidou. Here, if it’s a nice day, you can sit in the terrace and watch people go by (heavy traffic of very good looking men shuttling between the bars in le Marais and les halles) and the street performers tend to perform right in front of the café! This pseudo intellectual café is decorated in if you wish a modern traditional Parisian café, though once the smoking law comes into effect in February 2008, I cannot vouch for the ambiance…I will say it again, Paris café without smoke is SO unthinkable for me.

NOTE (2013):Central bar has since been closed.....a historical treasure gone.
NOTE (2014): Le Central and le Gai Moulin have also disappeared now :-( .

Paris lover 2

I cannot vouch for the fact that most French married men have a mistress or two. But there are indications that this “practice” is something that is an acceptable secret for most. Ex president Mitterand, for instance, had a mistress with whom he had a daughter that practically represented a public secret during his tenure as president of the Republic. In the US I think this would have been the end of one’s political career! I have also read that certain things could be related to this widespread practice of having mistresses. For instance, the numbers called that are listed on your phone bill normally include only the first 4 numbers with the rest masked by x’s. This way, your partner would not be able to check, I guess, who you’ve been calling at 2 AM! Yeah, right. As luck would have it, in my haste to be Parisian, I met married men who would become intermittent but nonetheless long terms lovers….. Now, how Parisian could you be, I asked myself.

The first man to whom I have been mistress (:-)) for the past six years, has been married for even longer than that. We met on the street in Pigalle as I was rushing to meet a friend at the café Fourmi. We looked at each other, smiled and exchanged phone numbers. I called him after leaving my friend at the café and met him in another café in Stalingrad. Lots of flirts and visits to toilets (with me always backing out because making love in a toilet just made me nervous). Finally we met in a house where a group of his friends lived (to whom he introduced me as someone he had worked with before. The problem was that I had slept with one of them before, which made for a rather uncomfortable situation. Like my then just met lover, he was supposedly straight). I had to wait till 3 AM on the deserted street waiting till his friends went to bed and we could use the kitchen where me made love quietly if urgently. Thereafter we used every corners and nooks we could in Paris to make love: a small secluded park near the canal, a friend of his who loaned us his apartment (he waited in a café below whilst we were there) and even in a sex cinema. Thank goodness I finally found an apartment of my own that made it possible for us to meet. Generally, he calls and I make myself available. But that is the life of a mistress.

In many ways, this type of relationship is exactly what I wanted. There is the romanticism of it all knowing that he is someone that I could not have though I could feel myself falling for him. Like a child that played with a favourite toy that he or she has to return when asked to do so. This makes him the object of my affection for the past 6 years with weekly RDVs that never last more than an afternoon or an evening. In the span of 6 years we cannot help but develop attachment despite the particular circumstance that surrounds our relationship. The RDVs are now punctuated with discussion of our lives. I become familiar with his life despite it being totally detached, yet, very much connected to me via the man that is part of my life for a very long time now. I cannot say if the fact that he is a forbidden garden, at least to me, or the fact that there exist clear limits beyond which each of our lives takes its own direction, or simply our love, is responsible for our long lasting relationship. But a good mistress does not pose too many questions. The least we know the better.

Paris: The strike or la grève

If you were in Paris on 19 October 2007, you probably noticed something different as you step out of your hotel or apartment. If you were setting out to do some sightseeing, you probably had to wait a long time for the metro (if it came at all) and fought the body to body crowd on the platform of the station. If you were planning to take the bus, the wait was just as long. If you were about to travel by plane and had to take the suburban RER to Charles de Gaulle airport, and you were brave enough to fight for space on the platform, let alone on the train, for yourself and your bags, you probably arrived at the airport much later than anticipated and a lot worse for wear. Funnily, taking a taxi did not pose a problem in term of traffic, as many Parisians I think had decided just to stay home.
That day, workers of public transportation have gone on strike. Striking or la grève is very much a French tradition as wine, good food and fashion. The big strike that lasted a while happened before I moved here in 1995. But since my arrival here I have had my share of grèves and have learned to take it in stride.

Living with the strike
The first time I experienced the strike, I was very angry and frustrated. I thought it was very egotistical of these transport workers to stop all transport to have what they want without thinking of others who still have to go to work and go about their business. However, having lived here, I finally understand and if have not yet learned to accept it fully, at least have learned to live with it without the anger and the frustration. Conflict is part of the French life. And the assumption in non friendship interpersonal relationship (between colleagues, between those in power and not in power, between supervisors and employees) tend to be that they will fuck you over if you don’t do something first (or sometimes, they will fuck you over if you don’t fuck them over first!). When potential disagreements arise (or mostly when unfavourable decisions or ideas are voiced by those in power), others take the conflict right away and call for a strike as a way to show power their way. The public transportation strike of the 18 oct was a show of force of unions and workers against those in power that have taken the decision to change the retirement age of these workers (Considered to be hard labourers, they have the right to retirement earlier than non hard labourers which the government is now attempting to take).
Bizarrely, people don’t negotiate first and then go on strike (which I think is what tends to happen in other countries such as Germany) if the negotiation fails. This is especially true in the relation between workers and government. However, having had to deal with the French administration, I now understand the need for this show of power on the street. French administration being so complicated, going through the regular channels would probably take forever and ineffective with the diffusion of responsibilities inherent in the system. In the hierarchical system, I guess there is always one person who is responsible, but before you get there, there are so many red tapes and hoops and holes that one must pass. Expressing anger and discontent seems to be an accepted part of French life even in everyday lives (Come to think of it, how many times have I observed spontaneous expression of Joie or happiness aside from in sport events when the French team wins? Not many actually).

Tackling the strike
Strikes would generally be announced in advance as warning has to be given to the government about this action being taken by workers. So, being good Parisians we take preparations to deal with this (and sometimes not so good preparations). Many would take time off which is more possible now since the working week has been reduced to 35 hours from 40 hours (entitling you to half a day off per week that you could accumulate). Many would take their car and just drive to work rather than take the metro. This is why we anticipate traffic jams everywhere on strike days though this did not happen really on the day of the 18th oct 2007 (but did on the 19th when the strike was partially extended without warning). Others will take bikes, rollers, mopeds etc. to transport themselves. And now since Paris has the Velib system (see my other blog entry: Paris on bicycle), this is an option that make striking days more bearable. However, the problem was that everyone thought of Velib that day. So, there were long lines of people waiting for a bike in bike stations that are woefully empty. A person who came along with a bike and returned it to the station was greeted with much joy as that meant the line was one person fewer. I ended up cycling across Paris for 45 minutes to get home which turned out to be quite pleasant anyway.
The wait for a bike happened again on a Friday. An interesting observation to illustrate the use of one of my sub stereotypes of Parisians. Whilst waiting, two guys were in front of me when someone with a bike arrived. The second guy, a very well dressed young man who had been clicking his heels impatiently and sighing loudly quickly grabbed the bike effectively cutting the line and went in front of the first guy. The first guy being young and I guess too polite did not say anything and sort of let the second guy get away with it. This is one of those moments where I wished I mastered the language enough to make some pointy but subtle comments about the guy’s behaviour. But instead, I just kept my mouth shut. I of course categorized the rude guy as the subgroup of egotistical Parisians who think they are good looking and so self-absorbed and full of self importance to the point of just being rude and deserving of a smack ! You see, frustrating little things like this brought about by the grève made me think that I am not quite home yet here…

Paris distractions: tv & Cinema

Buying a tv: the french way?
I decided to buy a television set mostly to improve my French. I figured that having images to accompany what I hear would greatly facilitate comprehension of French and my learning new French words when I first moved here. So, armed with my new carte bleue (What the French call their credit or debit card), I walked in to a department store, chose a tv and asked to have it delivered to my house. This, apparently, was not how most French people do it. They never have their tv delivered to their address (they give a false address when asked as is done when one buys a tv) and always pay cash! Why? Apparently to avoid the audiovisual tax that is imposed on all tv owners. I did not know this, but could later understand why they try to avoid it as the tax was not cheap (I think I have repaid the price of the tv just within a few years). There are apparently inspectors who would knock on your door to verify that indeed you did not have a tv in the house (if you claimed not to have one) or that you have paid your a/v tax…and they would come at ungodly hours such as 8 in the morning or dinner time making it difficult for people to hide their tv. A friend used to refuse to open her door for unannounced visits precisely because she feared tv inspectors. Once she hid behind her closed door after peeking through the peephole whilst the inspector rang and rang the bell and the sound of her tv blasting away and no doubt audible to the inspector. This scene apparently lasted a while before the inspector gave up and left! The recent change in law has however made this cat and mouse game much more difficult and serious. Now, we declare that fact that we have a tv on the income tax form (and pay it together with the residence tax applicable to all living here or taxe d’habitation. Yes, nothing is free in France) and the phrasing of the question (of whether you have a tv or not) was worded such that lying would be considered much more serious by law.

tv programmes
With just outside antenna, you get about 4 channels. TF1 is a station that I find rather conservative and show American and big production French films (The stations tend to show full length feature films right after the news that begins at 8pm). France 2 and France 3 are the public channels and show American, foreign and French films that may include independent production films and documentaries. Programmes are often split between these two stations. For instance, during the French open that is shown direct, in the early afternoon we watch it on France 2 and then move to France 3 in the late afternoon. There is also M6 which is probably the most American channel (among those accessible to all, not cable), showing many popular American series but dubbed in French as well as full length films. And finally, the French German channel called Arte that I thought has the most international and audacious programming of all channels. Arte is in French in France and in German in Germany. So, you may watch the news and the person was speaking German and this would be dubbed in French for French viewers (or vice versa). Cables have changed things of course, but my building did not even get cabled until 5 years ago!

French tv programmes were shockingly different to what I was used to in the US and to a significant degree, Australia. (Australia probably prepared me for France and in more ways than I realized, and made for a softer landing than if I were to move directly here from the US.) Whereas in the US evenings would be spent in front of one tv series after another of pure entertainment, in France there are lots of talk programmes. I am not talking about Oprah style talk shows, but discussion of serious topics such as politics and social issues. I find of course informative talks with people who are experts on the subject. However, often, talk shows have people that have nothing to do with the subject and who would discuss it as if they were the experts! In other words, we can see on tv what we say to each other over the dinner table. This is most curious as I care not to hear what a guy that came out of a reality tv show had to say about Presidential candidates, for instance. And sometimes they talk about nothing at all and just chat away as if they were discussing the most important subject on earth that should interest everyone. At times I felt like I was a voyeur in someone’s living room. Indeed, in everyday live the French is much more aware (and care) of political going ons in France and elsewhere compared to Americans (interesting to discuss it with friends, but not to watch it on tv). Politics, interpersonal problems and sex I think are the most debated subjects at dinners here.

On the other hand, the serious talk shows are excellent and do indeed inform with host or hostess that is sharp and does not mince words just to be nice. The host or hostess become celebrities in their own right, such as Christine Ockrent from France 3. Debates are real debates rather than polite exchange of opinions. This we find in everyday life as well. The Parisians and the French seem to appreciate those who stick to their opinion and may even be nasty about his or her beliefs more than those who were nice (and intelligent). Conflict does seem to be something that is perceived as necessary not only for an interesting conversation but, on a larger scale, for any changes in the society to take place. If I have the impression that the French seem to prefer status quo and avoid any changes, conflicts they love and see as legitimate means to start changes and resolutions. However, despite the agitations that may last a while and heated debates, in the end things stay the same.

french-speak on tv
Other curiosities on French television include the dubbing of almost all foreign films (including British and American films) in French. Public or private channels seem to stick to this practice pretty religiously, the exception being the French-German joint channel Arte who show films in their original language with subtitles. So, don’t get all excited when you see Desperate Housewives or Sex and the city listed in the tv programmes. Carrie, Sam, Charlotte and Amanda would be talking sex in French which to me had the same effect as listening to French rap a long time ago. Rap and French just did not seem to go together and to me it was like eating hamburger and French fries from a fastfood restaurant with a glass of good wine. I have overcome that now and have come to even appreciate French rap. But supposedly real NYers who get the jitters going outside Manhattan speaking French is still rather hard to swallow (not to mention, at that point for me, to literally understand what they said). Having finally gotten cable tv (more likely to show series in v.o. or version originale, that is in the original language) I was able to watch teva (said to be ‘feminin’ station, go figure). They showed Golden Girls in both French (early evening) and English (late at night)…frankly, Sophia and co seem to have acquired a different personality (i.e; were not half as funny) in French even when at that point I understood everything. I guess one cannot always translate the cultural references that the Golden Girls tend to make and take for granted nor the signification of regional accents and use of certain words (not easily translated, nor do they conjure up the same reaction or concept in people across the ocean….). I guess, I would have to ask myself how I could translate words such as Moxie (Blanche said, He said he liked my moxie) or just the concept that the name Shady Pines (or as Sophia says, the home) evokes in most Americans? Magnolia Queen (Blanche claimed she was one) was translated as Miss Mississippi (though the association is ok, I still wonder if it evoked the same image in the mind of the French!).

sex and tv
In contrast to their American counterparts, French tv stations are not at all shy about sex. I remember (on non cable channels at least) computerized masking of bare breasts etc. in American tv. Australian tv is less prudish (than American), but French tv takes the cake. Once 11 pm is past, you can see erotic films certain days (in which strangely, there is total nudity of the women but no frontal nudity of the men in these films). The station Arte often shows independent films that would contain total nudity of both men and women in regular feature length films or short features. Arte reminds me a lot of the SBS station in Australia (often called the Wog channel because of its ethnic or foreign orientation). PBS would probably be the closest though much paler American version of Arte.

cinema in Paris
Moving to the bigger screen, Parisians are avid movie goers. You can watch any significant movies ever made at any week in Paris (old or classic films may only be shown a couple of times a week, but they are shown still!). If you pick up the weekly guide listing movies playing in Paris, you will be amazed by the number of pages listing movie theatres (from the Cinema Complex with huge screen to small intimate theatres. Paris has hundreds of cinemas). New releases come out on Wednesdays and could be found in most mega complexes. There are also specialized theatres, playing independent production films or films of specific genre or language only. And there are theatres playing classic or non new releases which of course is a joy to one who only discovered the wonders of religiously going to cinema recently. New American films tend to come out about 6 months later than in the release date in the US. This might have something to do with dubbing. All films will be shown in VO (version originale, in English thus for American or British movies) at certain hours and in VF (version française, or dubbed in French) at other hours. Beware that titles might not be exact translation of that in English. Translation may be liberal and is adapted to the French. Having read and watched Harry Potter in French, I was most surprised to see that even names were translated (remember Wood who was captain of the Quidditch team? He is called Dubois or literal translation of the word wood in French!). Going to the cinema at about 10 euros a pop ain’t cheap, but still.

The theatre near Centre George Pompidou often shows foreign independent films that do not get the large distribution of Hollywood production films. To catch old classics or almost classics there are many small unassuming but charming independent theatres in the 6th arrodissement or the 5th toward Gobelin and Place Monge. My favourite theatres to catch new releases are in Jaurés (19th arrondissement). Indeed, even if these belong to a chain of movie theatres, the building and the site are worth the visit and a lot of planning seem to have taken place to ensure that the cinemas fit the particular character of the neighborhood. Hugging a canal with a building on each side (the two face each other across the canal), they were either a warehouse or an all purpose square nondescript building have been renovated and opened up with lots of glass instead of the original walls. There are cafés whose decoration reminds one of traditional Parisian cafes (and there is also a self service café for quick bites before films). Here you can sit in the café sipping your coffee and watching the boats on the canal and people passing by on foot, on bikes, or on rollerblades before catching your movie. Hey, la vie est belle !

Paris Cafés

If one was to say what words comes to mind when one thinks of Paris, many would probably say Cafés. Indeed, café is very much a part of Parisian life. We meet friends there, we think there, we write there, we break up there, we fantasize there (mostly about having an apartment bigger than a shoebox), but most of all, we people-watch there. People watching is a favourite past time of most Parisians and tourists who come to Paris. Chairs in Paris cafés, especially on the terraces, would not be set up around a table to facilitate conversation; instead, all chairs face the street so we can easily watch people pass by. We huddle around one side of a table making for intimate (if shoulder to shoulder rather than face to face) conversation whilst all the while also enjoy the beauties that pass in front of us. Often cafés do not even have terraces but chairs are set up against the outside walls of the café on the sidewalk with tiny tables to hold our drinks. It is not uncommon for passers by to bump your table and spill your drink all over you (a very efficient if embarrassing ice breaker).

Traditional Parisian cafés of dark red awnings, floor to ceiling glass and rather dark wood-y interior, straight back rattan chairs, a zinc top bar to one side where people can stand and drink, and older waiters in white shirt and black pants (and black apron) are becoming rare in certain areas (for instance, in the 4th arrondissement). And soon, a very integral part of Paris café, namely cigarette smoke, will also disappear with the anti-smoking law that comes into effect next year (2008). This is such a shame. I cannot imagine a Paris café without people smoking and without smoke! Many cafés now have also been renovated to look modern with bright primary colors (instead of the usual predominantly brown or other less bright colors) and comfortable chairs or poufs. Older male waiters have been replaced by hip looking young waiters and waitresses who indeed smile more and generally friendlier but often are less professional. The traditional professional waiters take pride in their job, unlike the new waiters/waitresses who are there to make money whilst waiting for something else to happen in their life. Professional waiters may be more arrogant, service less friendly, but those are part of the Paris café experience. And once you have their confidence, they can anticipate your every need (limited to café going, of course!).

In a café, you can either stand at the counter and drink your coffee or sit in the main room (salle) or in the terrace. The coffee would be priced accordingly, the cheapest being at the counter (about 1euros 50 for an espresso), followed by the salle (2 euro 50 or about) and finally the terrace (even more). If you order a coffee, they will probably serve you an espresso in a very tiny cup (but very strong and mostly excellent!). The other options would be a café au lait (or simply say crème, as Parisians call it). In more modern cafés you can order Cappuccino, Latté etc. but I prefer to stick with the traditional. Parisians drink crème in the morning (and dunking your croissant in it is an acceptable behaviour even in cafés), and espresso the rest of the day.

Drinking your coffee in the terrace gives the best view to watch people, but standing at the counter also has its advantages. Aside from the price, this is also much more conducive to conversation with strangers or with the bartender. People discuss and interrupt each other loudly. The bartender and waiters put in words every so often whilst zipping around like Speedy Gonzales serving and preparing drinks. Of course, you can order any other drinks in cafés, alcoholic or non alcoholic. In the summer, the green drink that you see a lot of people drink is called Menthe à l’eau (Normally, Perrier or other water mixed with mint syrup which is really yummy when you’re hot and thirsty). The pink colored drink is probably a Monaco, a beer mixed with grenadine syrup. If sweet beer is not exactly your cup of tea, so to speak, try a Picon biere (beer mixed with Picon which is bitter and caramel colored syrup and comes from the north and east of France). White beer is excellent too (called blanche) and usually served with lemon. A popular drink before dinner (aperitif) is Kir. Normally, it is a mixed of white wine with crème de cassis (or blackcurrant creamy syrup). There is also the Kir Royal which uses champagne instead of white wine. But of course, wine is the drink that everyone associates with France. Drinking mostly red, I like to have either Gamay or Brouilly for aperitif as it is quite light. A side note: Given the importance and the choice of wine in terms of origin and prices, if you’re invited or are inviting people for dinner, the best way is to go to a wine merchant and tell him what you plan to eat. He/she would give you a very complete suggestion of what wine to drink with each part of the meal (aperitif, entrée, main course, cheese and dessert!). For instance, white sweet wine is drunk with fois gras if you eat it as an entrée. This would avoid unnecessary headache of choosing what wine to serve or to bring, and avoid a disappointed smile from your host or hostess when you show up at their door bring wine that would not complement (or may be kill) the meal (if invited, host or hostess often tell you what they will be serving ahead of time, so you can safely ask for suggestion from the wine merchant).

Tipping is becoming more and more common in Parisian cafés though, in fact, service is already included in the bill (unlike in the US). However, it is common practice to round up as a tipping practice, so not quite a fixed percentage of the bill as we do in the US. Also remember that a cup of coffee gives you the right to hog the table for hours without so much as a dirty look from the waiters or waitresses! This is just as well, as there are so many beautiful men to watch in Paris. Parisians I found to be sharp dressers (ok, maybe not all over Paris, but at least in areas such as the gay areas such as le Marais, and tourist areas and so called rich areas such as the 16th, the 5th, 6th, 7th, 8th arrondissements). Interestingly, tourists in Paris seem to have taken up the habit as well. OK, sometime we do see a group of Americans wearing the same baseball cap so they would not loose each other, but most actually seem to have tucked the traditional tourist garbs of shorts and t shirts (mostly on those whose legs were better off not shown to the world) in the deepest pocket of their suitcase or backpack. I love especially watching the Japanese tourists who seem to have successfully integrated French couture with their sense of refined dressing. Many friends who come to Paris indeed said they feel they should dress better here because they stick out when they take out their usual comfortable tourist garbs!

Cafés also serve food, mostly traditional French food that may not be as refined as restaurants but simpler though often not less good. Beware though that traditional cafés do not serve food at all times. The French are quite disciplined when it comes to eating (is that why they are all so slim?). So lunch would be served between 12 and 14h or 15h and dinner between 19H to about 23h. There are exceptions, of course. And there are also certain types of food that you can get at café anytime like sandwiches (baguettes with either cheese or meat) or toasted bread with cheese and meat (Croques Monsieur). Aside from Croque Monsieur, forget about wonderful hot sandwiches that we get in NYC or San Francisco. No Ruebens or Hot Pastrami or Corned beef sandwiches here! And they don’t come with chips and pickles either!

Living in the 4th arrondissement, I have seen traditional cafés go and are replaced by their more modern version that, to me, resemble a lot those I frequented in San Francisco or Sydney. A favourite of mine that still retains somewhat its old character is the Pick Clops on rue Vieille du Temple. Otherwise, I go towards Republique or further up towards the 18th and 19th arrondissements. Across the river Seine there are also cafés that retain their traditional characters such as those along the river Bank near Saint Michel. And of course, you probably want to pay a visit to those famous cafés of all times (at least for Anglos) Les Deux Magots and Café Flore. Always crowded, always noisy (with all languages) and have the most eclectic people as clients (from tourists to habitués who sit in their usual table, reading, writing, and smoking). Going there reminds me of how fun it is to be a tourist in Paris...

Paris départs: London, Brussels, Agadir

I love Paris also for the fact that from here I can easily reach many points dear or not so dear to my heart easily. It used to take me 6 hours (from New York), 12 hours (from LA) or 24 hours (! from Melbourne) on a 747 to get to London. Now I can hop on the Eurostar and be in London a mere 2 and a half hours later. One can also hop on the Thalys and be in Brussels in just over an hour (and to Amsterdam and Cologne in about 4 hours). Train travel was never much of an option when I was living in the US or Australia (The only train line I took often was the NJ Transit from Princeton to NYC. Though indeed I still wish to travel the Orient Express, both the European version and its equivalent in Australia that traverses the continent from east to west). Train travel in France is fast, comfortable, if not so cheap. Most of the cities in France are linked to Paris via the high speed trains, le TGV (Trains à grande vitesse).

Le TGV remains one of the technological prides of France. It reduces travelling time within France considerably and links Paris to many of the other cities in the country, if exactly not between these cities themselves. For the TGV, Paris is still very much the center point from where all trains depart. Now, we can be in Marseille in just three hours and the new line to Strasbourg has just been celebrated with great fanfare (Paris-Strasbourg can now be done in just over 2 hours instead of 4. This also has a side effect of reducing air fares between these two cities considerably). Considering that many Parisians are settlers who maintain close psychological ties with their terre in the province (province refers to anything outside the Paris city limits, by the way), le TGV that progressively makes every town within comfortable reach from Paris no doubt contributes to the mental well being of many Parisians.

Paris has several main stations (gares) from which trains depart depending on your destination. Gare de Lyon handles, for instance, trains to the southeast such as Marseille. Gare Montparnasse for trains to Bordeaux and La Rochelle or the southwest, Gare de l’Est handles trains to the east such as Strasbourg and Luxembourg for the foreign destination. Gare du Nord is probably the station that you will get to know if you arrive from London via Eurostar or from Brussels via Thalys. This could mean that if you travel from Brussels to Marseille, you have to change not only trains but hike it from one station to another. But all in all, trains are very efficient and popular means of transport in France and from France to neighboring countries. Besides, you get to enjoy the scenery even at over 300km/h. Again, trains might not always be the cheapest travel options from Paris. These days, travelling to London by air can be much cheaper than travelling there by train, for instance. Checking the internet for special fares can be rewarding though. In Paris, best to avoid departing on Friday nights (when everyone goes to their province) and Sunday nights (when everyone comes back to the city) when all the stations would be a madhouse of people on the verge of a mental breakdown for fear of missing their trains or the last metro.

Paris - London (Londres)
Whenever I feel nostalgic for an anglo life style, I take a day trip from Paris to London to get my dose of friendly and polite waiters/waitresses, munchies and eating at all hours of the day (in Paris many restaurants do not serve out outside the hours associated with eating, namely lunch and dinner. Forget trying to get something cooked between 4 and 7 at night, for instance). I leave at the reasonable hour of 10 am, arrive in London in time for lunch (London is one hour behind Paris) of maybe fish and chips (Of course, none of my French friends could understand that I sometime have a craving for this supposedly not so refined food), do a bit of window shopping (especially the Australian shoe/boots shop Blundstone), take in the Tate modern and take the train back after a spot of coffee towards 19h (or a ride on the London Eye) to be back in Paris at 11 pm in time to go for drinks with friends in Oberkampf street.

To me, no two other cities seem to be so different and so alike as London and Paris. They are alike as both have the big city feel that you also get in New York. You feel the rush, you feel the energy and possibilities in both cities. But Londoners can still be polite even if in a hurry, euh, unlike Parisians. My image of Paris (generalization, of course, based on salient features, but as you know, this is a very basic cognitive tendency among humans) is Chic and Conformist. Of London, I have a schizophrenic image that is both conservative and punk, and creative. If London was a gay man, he would be dressed in tailored grey suit or in leather with all the accessories. If Paris was a gay man, he would be dressed very chic with attention to the last details (including how his scarf should be tied just so around his rather wrinkled neck, for instance). Despite the individualism that Parisians may attempt at how they look, they would still conform to this idea of chic that is shared by everyone. You cannot define chic alone!

Paris - Brussels (Bruxelles)
On those getaway days when I don’t feel like bringing my umbrella, I take the Thalys to Brussels instead. Arriving in Brussels’ Gare du Midi (or Zuid), you can take the tram to go to the Grand Place and admire this little spot that features 17th century buildings or older (eg. the Hotel de Ville) with eclectic architectures reflective of the region. Brussels overall has wonderful art nouveau buildings. Everything is nearby, including the Manneken Pis (Manekin Pis) which I imagind being a lot bigger that it actually is. Among the myriad of cafés in the Grand place, there is also a wonderful bagel shop that serves good bagels with all kinds of toppings. You put in your order downstairs and bring it upstairs in a room that looks out on the Grand Place and is decorated as if the living room of a friend. Parks are wonderful in Brussels including the Parc Cinquantenaire and the Royal Art Park (both, by the way, are very cruisy at night). And of course, the French fries in Brussels are the best (I have heard that Brussels claimed to be the birth place of French fries?) to be eaten with the special mayonnaise and not ketchup. And don’t forget Belgian chocolates. Paris may be known as the place for fashion haute couture, but Brussels is the place for haute couture of chocolate! If Paris has Jean Paul Gaultier, Brussels has Pierre Marcolini!
If chocolate could substitute for sex, I can understand why the Belgians do not make love as much as the French (Again, stereotype!). Once I went to a Parisian bar before taking in a movie on the 5th arrondissement. During the conversation with the bartender I mentioned that I was going to see the film ‘La vie sexuelle des Belges.’ (The sex life of Belgians). Without missing a beat he said that oh well that should be a short movie! Back to Brussels, shopping streets are all within walking distance from the Grand Place, including an aeroplane model store (for my aviation enthusiasts friends) on the small street just behind the Grand place on the cafés side. Brussels I find small enough to have that small town feeling, but still offers enough to visitors. In both London and Brussels, you can buy day tickets that you can use for unlimited travel on their public transport system.

Paris - Agadir
Paris also is well served by air service to many points that could serve as weekend getaways. Morocco represents an exotic destination reachable in a mere flying time of 3 hours. One grey January in Paris, I took a short break to go to Agadir, in southern coast of Morocco. Three hours after I left Orly on a 737 of Royal Air Maroc and said good bye to snowy and cold Paris, I was in my shorts lying on the beach sipping exotic fruit juices in sunny weather. The water was a bit cold but hey, the sand was warm and the men were hot. And to find a totally different country climatically, linguistically, culturally, politically and in many other ways just 3 hours away (and not very expensive either, the ticket prices were about the same as if not lower than flying to other parts of Western Europe) what more could one ask? Hotels were reasonable and often right by the beach. All this after just a few clicks on the internet and, Voila, you find yourself surrounded by warm friendly people who are eager to welcome you to their country.

Being so different, Agadir/Morocco could be very eye opening. The difference between the rich and the poor is still visible as it is in many developing countries. I was invited by a new Moroccan friend to his home that was probably more appropriately described as a hut. No flooring, no toilet inside and reached via a small dark alleyway that inclines sharply outside the city limit (I had to admit that I started to question my decision to go home with this man of whom I knew nothing about then. He turned out to be the sweetest man! Despite being poor, he was generous and insisted on giving me a cadeau of very kitsch plastic yellow flowers that my Paris friends would find simply horrifying before he took me back to my hotel. I still indeed have the flowers to remind me of him, though they are well hidden in my closet). In contrast, another (Moroccan) friend that I met through the gay network lived in a beautiful traditional house that incorporates different levels, open spaces and huge!

Restaurants vary in prices depending on whether they cater to tourists or not (though all is still cheap compared to Paris). I ate at the port of Agadir with a Moroccan friend, eating freshly caught fish cooked right there with salad and bread and it cost the same as drinking two cafés au lait (or crème as we call it in Paris) in a café back in Paris. Expect to pay more in tourist restaurants, naturally. Many restaurants in the city don’t serve wine or alcoholic drinks either, though the hotel bars were very well stocked.

In Agadir, I understood for the first time the ugly tourist concept: Moneyed men from rich countries who buy off and surround themselves with young men. Having observed one closely in a restaurant (where the tourist flaunted his cash for all to see, with an apparent sheer conviction that he could buy everyone there with his money), I slunk away shame faced as if these moneyed men’s behaviors unavoidably reflected on me. I suppose despite the fact that I did not see any link whatsoever between these men and myself, I am well aware that the people here might lump us in the same category of tourists. On the other hand, walking around late at night, I was also approached by local guys who right away declared their love (or at least their availability) though I felt they also anticipated that you give them something in return (ie., money). Money talks I guess. And it beckons those who are in need, late at night in Agadir.

Agadir is not one of the imperial cities that have beautiful traditional architectures or typically Morrocan feel to it as Fez or Marrakech. The city was destroyed by an earthquake some forty years ago (1960) and was therefore rebuilt new. Nonetheless, the people, the beach and the weather make this place very special. There is a center for local artworks where you can see local artists at work. There is the traditional market or souk. There is also a birdpark right in the middle of the city which, despite its name, strangely included non-bird 4 legged animals! Walking around this park, you escape the hustle and bustle of the city and car noises that are typical of any city. Along the beach, you find cafes and places where you can get fresh juice of fruits that you cannot even name but are simply delicious. People come to the beach to surf (body suits needed for January though) or just to lie on the warm sand and sun with a book as I did. Oh yes, and you can ride camels on the beach too.

Paris lover 1

Frédéric was my first lover after I moved to Paris. Soon after my arrival here, I acquired the habit of taking long walks late at night along the river Seine, especially along the Quai st Bernard. One night, I spotted a young man carrying a shopping bag from Sentou. Now, if you shop there (it’s a shop for home decoration) it almost always means that you have good taste! One look at the guy, and I would not have cared if he had taste or not…he was so sexy. This place, being known as a gay cruising place, no excuse was necessary to strike up a conversation (if indeed one wishes to converse before going into the bushes). But I think of Miss Manners and I decided to talk instead of simply make myself scarce in the bushes and hoping that he would follow. Thank you Miss Manners, this turned out to be a good decision.
We talked until very late and he walked me halfway home (OK, I lied, we did go into the bushes for a bit). We exchanged phone numbers and thus began my first Paris love story.

In many ways, Frederic was the epitome of what I thought Parisian lovers ought to be. Impulsive, passionate, emotional complete with a touch (in fact, a truckload) of existential crises that would surge in unlikely moments such as between love makings. He called me at least 5 times during the day just to say that he thought of me, even though at night we would see other. I was on cloud 9 and could tell that I was falling for him just because he was falling for me. The law of reciprocity? Who knows and who cares.

The first night, we met up at the café Beaubourg. Among books, handsome waiters, cigarette smoke, candles, flowing drapes and the Centre George Pompidou in front who could help but fall in love ? We walked out and he declared right then that he was falling in love with me. I looked him in the eye and said, as any reasonable person (or any new Parisian) would, that he barely knew me. He said, (translated) Let’s fuck and get to know each other, which sounded just parfait perfect in French. This suggestion is not, by the way so French, but just so gay the world over: we have sex to get to know each other (and not the other way around!). We went back to my place and we got to know each other again and again.

But, this was, I thought, so unFrench. Where are the dramas and the crises that I see in French films? Well, I should have known, as indeed cloud 9 soon descended to meet mother earth. First off, him being Jewish, our sorties in my neighbourhood was a bit awkward (my neighbourhood is a gay and a jewish neighbourhood). He risked and therefore was wary of running into those he had always known since he was a child (whilst having me in his arms). Lesson number 1: Frenchmen may be crazy, irrational and impulsive when it comes to love but only when not in their neighbourhood and risk being found out by family friends. (This explains partly why French lovers are considered great by foreigners. I guess they meet them overseas and not in their home turf!).

Drama or crisis number two, it is so true that no single good guy is available once you reach a certain age and beyond. He indeed told me that not only did he have a b.f. but that they were living together. This idea could excite some people, but once I decided I was in love I had no desire to share him with anyone else. The problem was that his lover was coming back soon from his travel. Our time together would then be reduced to afternoon trysts. And in a typical French fashion, Frederic looked at me and shrugged his shoulders as if none of it was his fault, C’est la Vie ! (The existence of this lover could also explain why he was reticent about walking arms in arms as lovers do with me in my AND in his neighborhoods)

Third, despite the few remaining days before the return of his lover, our time together was constantly interrupted by his neurotic friends. I could not figure out why he had so many neurotic friends nor attribute this to his being gay, being French or being Jewish or all three. In any case, he would spend hours on the phone talking to his hysterical friends that seemed to have one existential crisis after another. He of course thought I was being so insensitive when I told him that if his friends wished to commit suicide 5 times a day, maybe he should just let them and see. No, existential crises are very real and had to be taken very seriously, including getting into fight with your new lover, or should I say plaything, seeing now that the cat (his real lover) is out of the bag. However, between his own and his friends' existential crises there was hardly time for us two to exist!

Through Frederic I learned that long friendship is very important to my French friends. Many keep in touch and still live near friends that they knew since they were still in shorts! This cannot be more untrue for me, I have not lived near my old friends for along time what with all the moves that I have done as well as those of my friends. My French friends seem to not have this idea of mobility at the price of putting distance between themselves and their friends or family. If they do move (from province to Paris, most often), they do go back pretty often as if to recharge their battery by breathing the air of their terre.

Finally, to make matters worse, I was becoming allergic to his cats (Actually, I just said that to convince myself that Frederic and I were indeed never meant to be. The cats were in fact lovely and certainly were less neurotic than his friends).

So, despite the Halva that he brought me, bought from a special Jewish store, our love started to be less sweet than sugar.
The intense love that he felt for me seemed to have died as suddenly as it appeared. Oh, C'est la vie I thought, munching on the Halva and getting a tooth ache.

I consoled myself saying that this is Paris where love is in the air that one could catch it as quickly as one could lose it. No worries, I told myself in my most optimistic logical frame of mind, the wind will surely blow this way again. But then I picked up the phone and expressed my angoisse to my new French friends. This is how we get to know each other here, non ? When in Paris, do as Parisians do.

French-speak in Paris

In a clothing store once, I heard a booming voice of an American man who asked for the store manager. Once identified, the man told the manager loudly for all to hear how bad the service in the store was. It’s true that there was a long line of costumers waiting to pay with only one flustered employee present at the cashier, while the other employees were standing around chatting among themselves. This is unlikely to happen in the US where a new line would be opened to speed up the process, especially when other employees can leave their less urgent tasks (in the case of the aforementioned store, they were in fact doing nothing very urgently!).
What happened next was a classic French reaction I thought: the manager looked at the American and calmly said Je ne parle pas Anglais, Monsieur (I don’t speak English, Sir). I found this hilarious as just a few minutes before I spotted him speaking reasonably comprehensible English to another costumer. This incident illustrates many things that I had to learn to live in Paris. In this particular blog, about learning French.

I arrived here with very basic French which was considered to be OK in Melbourne when conversing with my French native speaker professors but was woefully inadequate in Paris. I quickly realized that not all Parisians articulate as clearly as my lovely French professors nor speak as slowly. This, to say the least, was extremely frustrating. In super markets I only bought stuff that I could find myself as the idea of asking and explaining something I need in French to a store employee (if he or she can be found) was enough to make me sweat (Once I was looking for baking soda and ended up with salt). When I went to a boulangerie (pastry shop) full of costumers and everyone was shouting their order, I slunk away defeated as first of all I was sure that they would not understand what I wanted, and furthermore I had no idea what the name is for each of the wonderful cakes and pastries they had on display (I did come back when the shop was rather empty, and now I find boulangers who put little notes indicating the name of each of the delicious products). Yes I will take a Paris-brest (round pastry cut in half and filled with cream…now this does not particularly make me think of Paris or of Brest), a Divorce (shaped of two round parts made up of éclair with café on one side and chocolate on the other, separated by a line of creamy topping. Now I would probably call it marriage rather than divorce since the two eclairs of coffee and chocolate usually are united!) and a Cochon (cochon means pig…these little wonderful almond paste cake is shaped like a pig and is pink. At least for this one you can guess where the name comes from).

Some words in French are just too difficult for Anglophones and other foreigners to pronounce. The letter u for instance that is pronounced by (this is an advice from a friend) first positioning your mouth and lips as if you were going to pronounce ‘ee’ (as in the first syllable in the word event). And whilst maintaining this position, you attempt to say the letter u (as in prude) instead. You got it now. But having to make all this preparation before actually producing the word containing the letter u, I would have lost the person I am speaking to (especially waiters in Paris cafes who always seem to be in a hurry and will give you 3 seconds flat to reel off your order as he was already turning to go and will undoubtedly let at least half an hour pass before noticing you again). Up to today, for some reason I still have problem pronouncing DEUX (or two). Consequently, when I buy cigarettes, I buy either 1 or 3 packs but never 2! Another maddening thing is the nasal sound that I never knew could vary in so many ways as in French.

french courses
I did follow a French course in Paris that was somewhat intensive. The class met for a couple hours everyday. This did help a bit but was simply not fast enough for me. I needed to understand and speak French quick. Sure, the course was great for making a lot of interesting and international friends to have coffees and go out with, but not enough French to get me to the level I wished to have. I finally decided to fork out a rather (for me) a lot of money to improve my French and enrolled in an immersion program in Nice, in the south of France. I arrived there and was promptly escorted to the apartment where I was to stay for the two weeks program (Most students stay for one month, but I could not imagine spending so much money and thus only stayed for half the time and paid half price). The program starts the next morning at 8 with breakfast with students and professors. All conversation was to be in French only and each foreign word pronounced would bring a small amount of monetary penalty that would be put in a jar to contribute to our end of program party. You can imagine breakfast on the first day was a rather silent affair with lots of smiles on the part of the students. The professors fired away though, with their clear and well articulated French whilst we students nodded and smiled.

After breakfast, we divided into small groups and followed different professors. There are different exercises that are far away from the traditional teaching methods found in most language courses or schools. Games, presentation, films, listening to the radio, reading the newspaper, you name it we did it. The aim of the program was to understand and be understood in French, no matter what your accent. This was rather successfully done by speaking French exclusively from breakfast until dinner time involving professors and small number of students.
Like children, we also learn different names of food and French cuisine during lunch and dinner as well as table manners. For instance, the person on the right of the host usually is the guest of honor. We always start with entrée (in the US we call this appetiser), followed by plat principal (in the US, entrée), followed by wonderful French cheeses and finished up with dessert. Espresso coffee was served at the end, though cigarettes had to be smoked outside (so unFrench!). The French I thought was rather rigid with this order when eating. Despite numerous attempts to ask waiters to bring my coffee together with dessert which I like to do, I was rarely successful to have them both at the same time in cafés and restaurants.

The program also arranged excursions to museums and we learned to talk and make comments about art in French. Funny, artistic comments made in French just sound more intelligent even when saying nothing. A wonderful professor was a very spunky older female (small, white haired, and dressed not at all like a French person but more like someone from New Mexico, you know, outdoorsy) who also taught us argots or slang words. This turned out to be very useful in my everyday life!
The emphasis of the program being comprehension and expression, we did not have to do homework (aside from thinking about presentations for the next day) nor take lots of notes but did listen and express ourselves a lot. And it turned out to be very successful. A woman from Australia whose French was non existent at the start of the program could a couple weeks later do a decent presentation in class. I was very very impressed.

The program, being expensive, attracts a rather special clientele. In my group, there were lawyers from large US firms handling French companies and thus having branch offices here, UN workers, and a PDG of a known multi national company. Interesting to observe how contexts influence our behaviors. These professionals, within a couple of days, were transformed to misbehaving high school students who giggled at the silliest things. We had a blast, and at the end of my two week stay, we even had a blast in French!

For a long time after my course I measured my progress in French using a method a prof there suggested to students: I listen to the station France Info which repeats the same news over and over again. I remember the first time my group listened in on the news from France Info. After one run, the professor asked us what we understood. Well, we sort of got the words like Australie, tennis, and that’s about all. We listened and listened again until we got the gist of the different news. Back at home in Paris I knew I was making progress as I was able to understand the whole news with fewer and fewer cycles with time. And now, I understand everything the first time around. Yes!

France/french today
Don’t despair if you don’t speak French, though. Today, many young French speak English and love speaking English. In restaurants in Paris you may be spoken to because you speak English (how different to stories of Americans who were treated badly because they could not speak French before…yes, times they are a changing. But remember the story at the beginning of this blog!!). It is still a good idea to say a few words in French to show that you try. The French appreciate it when non speakers attempt to speak French and will gladly continue the conversation in English. These, in my experience, happen mostly with younger French. So, say Bonjour (Good day), Bonsoir (Good evening), Merci (Thank you), Excusez moi (Excuse me) when striking a conversion (Also, Parlez vous Anglais ? do you speak English? Can I buy you a drink? Je t'invite pour un verre ?). Oh, by the way, don’t ever call the waiters Garçon despite what your French language or guide books say…better call them Monsieur and you will get a much better service.

The French language itself is evolving and incorporates foreign words at least in everyday speak. Of course there is a French academy watchdog of the French language that decides what new words can now be considered part of the French vocabulary…this probably explains why people buy dictionaries every year. An interesting observation is that the French adopt a lot of English words in their everyday speak but the meaning or use of these words could sometimes be slightly different to their original meaning in English. Take for instance the word People. For the French, People (sometimes spelled Pipol, or the French spelling for the English pronunciation) means those who are currently considered the in-crowd or trend setters, such as known artists, DJs, actors/actresses etc. Another is le weekend which means weekend of course. However, sometime the French would shorten it to just le week. So when someone say I will call you ce week, this means this weekend and not this week! Cool is used a lot too as in C’est cool (meaning hey that’s fine with me or it’s fine or that's great or I like it, depending on the intonation).

There are lots of Anglophones in Paris. There are also places where we speak English, like the American church, different social expat groups and many bars that cater mostly to Anglophone clienteles (Irish, English and Australian bars, American and Australian restaurants etc.). But why be in France when you only go to Anglophone places? Allez (Come on), let yourself go and be French (at least while you’re here). C’est cool !

Oh by the way, I just had to put in the example of the store situation at the top because if there is one word that I find the French have yet to learn it's indeed SERVICE (let's not even dream of Service with a smile).

Paris public transport

Having spent my pre-driving years in LA, I of course did not know that efficient public transport could exist and be useful. This changed when I first moved to NYC. I fell in love with the subway and would take it even at 3 am from the village to go uptown. I would be the only passenger in the car and I could sing, dance and shout to my heart’s content. This, unfortunately I cannot do in Paris as the subway or metro in Paris does not run all night (stops around midnight weeknights and around 2 AM on weekends).

But the system is, at least in my experience, much more efficient, frequent and feels very much a part of the Parisian experience (In New York, I think the yellowcabs and not the subway have this role of a NY experience). The web of the metro is such that you are never too far away from a metro station wherever you are in the city. Granted Paris is actually quite small and not spread out compared to many American or Australian cities, let alone Los Angeles. In general, public transport (metro, buses) in Paris is excellent and fast and comfortable.



Paris metro
To use the metro, one can purchase a ticket at windows or automated machines found in stations (Look for the letter M sign in yellow). Individual tickets cost about 1.50 euros (check ratp.fr to get the latest tariff). Or you can save a couple euros by buying a carnet de tickets (10 tickets for which you get a reduction for each individual ticket). A ticket is valid for one time travel only. So, if you have to change lines, do not go out of the station as this will mean that you would have to pay for another ticket. Follow the sign Correspondence (transfer) and the line number that you have to take. Most likely you will have to go through long tunnels and go up and down stairways (if they look old, remember that Paris had its first metro in 1900). So, if you have luggage, taking the metro that involves many changes might not be the best idea. But you might be treated to a very Parisian experience, namely live music or even French music if you’re lucky. These musicians all have permit to do their music in the metro system. You might also notice that many have CDs of their music displayed and for sale.

Among the musicians one regularly encouters in Paris metro, I love the accordionist that often plays at the station Franklin Roosevelt, especially when he plays popular old French music. There is also the South American guitarist who sings and make you think of the Andes, and a South American group playing traditional music instrument. You might find them in Châtelet or République stations. Stop and listen, they are great. Another favourite of mine is a young woman who plays guitar and sings songs of Piaf. She has an incredible voice and I often ask myself why she sings in metro stations and not in a concert hall or has a recording contract already. I get goosebumps whenever I listen to her singing Piaf"s Non, je ne regrette rien. In Châtelet we might also find an orchestra composed of young people who look like students playing classical music.

Aside from individual tickets or carnet de tickets, you can also buy a Paris visite tickets for a specific number of days (1, 2, 3 or 5 days priced from around 8 to 28 euros). This ticket allows you to get on and off the metro and the buses as many times as you like within the validity days. Designed mostly for tourists, you may also get discounts to museums etc.

If living in Paris, you can of course take out weekly, monthly or yearly ticket valid for buses and metro. This use to be called Carte Orange. You get a ticket that you use and reuse for the period that it is valid for. This is progressively being replaced by the spiffier looking Passe Navigo. The advantage of this new pass, aside from the stronger plastic compared to the paper coupon for the carte orange, is that it can be optically read by the turnstiles. So, you don’t have to take out your ticket (there is no ticket in the Passe Navigo) and put it through the slot in the turnstile which everyone else with any other types of tickets has to do. With a Pass Navigo, you simply place it near the optic reader and you hear a beep indicating you can pass through the turnstile. Great to avoid the crowd of tourists blocking the turnstiles to put their ticket through the slot in the turnstile as there are now turnstiles that only have the Navigo pass reader in addition to the normal turnstiles.

If using a regular ticket, remember to keep it until you leave the station at your destination. At times there are controllers that would check that you indeed have travelled with a ticket. They often place themselves near exits. And they don’t hesitate to give you a fine (monetary penalty) for not having a ticket. Trying to weasel your way out by speaking English does not work anymore!

Paris bus
The same metro ticket is valid on Paris bus system. Bus travel is now much speedier since many roads have bus lanes, thanks to the Paris socialist gay mayor Bertrand Delanoë. My advice though is still: if in a hurry, take the metro. On the other hand, if you have time, travelling by bus means that you can take in the sight of Paris.

A bus line that I consider one of the most beautiful is bus no. 72 between Hotel de Ville and Porte de Saint Cloud. Best to take the metro to Saint Cloud and return using the bus. You will be treated to all the major sights of Paris whilst riding on streets just above la Seine. The sights include Pont Neuf (the famous bridge over la Seine in Paris), Trocadéro, Eiffel Tower, Grand Palais, Concorde and of course Hôtel de Ville de Paris (Paris town hall).

Buses are also useful if you miss the last metro when you finally extract yourself from the club, bar or wherever you spend your evening. Once the metro stops, night buses or Noctillien can take you to the center, or from the center to all areas around Paris. They run less frequently than day buses of course, but great money saver. The ticket costs a bit more than day buses and it does not take the regular tickets used for metro and day buses. If in the center, the area around Hôtel de Ville and Châtelet is the terminal for all night buses. Take care though, as there might be drunk passengers (who are usually sweet and fun but you might run into aggressive types too) or worse, those who are sick from too much alcohol. If you start noticing someone’s face turning blue and white or having expressions as if he or she had just swallowed a frog, better move away or you may have a very disgusting experience as I did once (think Poltergeist).

Aside from buses, late nighters can also now use bikes (Velib, see my other entry Paris on bicycle). As Paris is compact, it is possible to traverse Paris on a bike, especially at night when traffic is light. Watch out for Schumacher wannabe drivers that would rev up their machines just because they think the road is empty and thus can be treated as a racing track.

Of course there are taxis too. Watch for the light on top of the car, please. If it is turned on, the taxi is available for hire, when turned off, it is occupied. I have seen too many people flapping their arms about like giant birds trying to stop a passing taxi when the light was off! Of course these taxis would ignore you and not stop. Tarifs differ if your ride within the city limits or if you go out of the limits or beyond the peripheriques.

Your wallet and Mr. Right on public transport
Finally, a word of advice on the public transport in Paris. If you’re hoping that in Paris someone would steal you heart, watch out for your wallet, purse etc. so that you don’t have to cut your holidays short and miss Mr. Right that may be just around the corner or in the next arrondissement. In rush hours in metro especially, wallets should not be in your back pocket, purses should be closed and kept in sight. Funnily, the station and metro agents seem to know who these agile hands are. Often you hear announcement in all possible languages saying that pickpockets have been spotted at the station or on the train and to watch out for your wallet and money!

Happy sightseeing and may you bump into Mr. Right (or Mr Adequate or Mr Right Now, depending on what you're looking for) on your next metro trip ! (Intersting tidbit: Apparently the last car of the train/metro used to be cruisy a long time ago. This is not the case today, from my experience lol!)