Getting a French driver's licence

For some weird reason I have always had a driver’s licence (and have kept it valid) even when I have not driven much in the past decade or so…I guess this is really a vestige of my younger days, coming of age (and coming out) in Los Angeles where you could say No Licence No Life (I mean fun life of course). Cruising on foot in LA may get you mugged, or taking in the distances between cruising areas, you may arrive too tired, too dirty after all that walk or bus rides!

So, living in Paris, I thought at some point that it would be a good idea to exchange my licence for a French one. I also pictured myself zipping around in a Smart (very small cars, almost like half a car really....not because they have good engine, I don’t know about that, or are convenient, but frankly because they look so cute and come in cute colors). I must have had amnesia about how complicated administrative things could be in France (things could have changed today…best to go to the Prefecture to get the latest exchange procedure).
Going to the prefecture to get the French licence I already picture myself that night in a rented Smart heading to Bois de Vincennes gay cruising areas (though how anyone could ever make love in a Smart is beyond me….one has to be a contortionist really). I was, of course, way too optimistic. Indeed I expected simply turning in my foreign licence and getting the new French licence and Hello Smart cars!. That was not to be. First off, not all foreign licences (or for American licence, not all states) could be exchanged directly with a French licence. California licence, for instance, was not directly exchangeable even though a licence from a state like North Carolina (what the hell?) could be exchanged no problem. Australian licences (regardless of states/territories) could finally now be exchanged with a French licence.
Another paper that I needed and did not have was an official confirmation that I have driven more than some years (so, I did not just go out of the country to get a licence and come back to exchange it with the French one). On my licence it was indicated the date of expiration but not the date when I first got my licence ….so, back on the international long distance phone, after waiting given the time difference, to ask for this specific letter.

Finally, I managed to have all the papers: the translation of my foreign licence (by the embassy), a letter stating that I have been driving for years as indicated by the date when my licence was first issued (in fact, the date I was licenced to drive), electricity bill as proof of my address, my passport (photocopied a number of times), and photographs. I completed the form, turned it in with all the papers directly to the person and waited patiently. Hours later, I was called and was given my licence. Surprise, it is a piece of long pink carton and not at all high tech (all the info is typed and your photo is stuck and laminated on, so unlike my old licence that looks like a credit card with infos and photo numerically printed on. Another surprise, I could find no expiration date! This means that you could be of an age that has to be carbon dated and have corresponding reaction times and yet you could still drive?)

Now, before you said Why didn’t I just get a new licence in France rather than go through all that? In France, it is compulsory to go through a driving school that costs a mint (like 2500 euros !) to get a licence. And the tests are really tough apparently as many people fail many times. I remember fondly how I got my first (California) licence : I went to a newsagent to get the DMV booklet for a few dollars, got a relative who is not afraid of dying to teach me to drive in the neighborhood and presented myself for the written and driving test in a local DMV (Department of Motor Vehicles). Much simpler. Yet, the mystery remains of why Californian drivers are so much more disciplined compared to Parisians…

Paris Driving

The best advice I could give you about driving in Paris is Don’t ! for many many reasons, mostly having to do with Parisian drivers.
The Parisians, like most French people, think rules are there to be broken. This creates a terrible situation : the more there are rules introduced to regulate trafic, the more Parisians are motivated to break them !
Driving in Paris means that you have to have faith in your luck, but especially be very very alert. Pedestrians think nothing of jumping into the street to take over other pedestrians on the sidewalk, or to cross when the little man is red if they even cross on pedestrian crossings (most likely not).
You also have to be very alert of other drivers who would probably think that you’re driving too slow (even when you’re well over the speed limit) and will toot their horns to push you (and yet, when they have to stop somewhere, they think nothing of stopping and blocking everyone and curse you for honking after waiting a reasonable amount of time). Don’t speed even when you don’t see any police around, there are discrete radars everywhere and you will receive a letter stating when and how much over the speed limit you were driving …

The golden rule that everyone has to respect is to give way to your right : This may mean that even in a big round about you have to give way to cars coming in from your right (unless it is specified that those already in the round about have priority). So, when you’re circling the Arc de Triomphe you will have to stop for those coming in from the zillion avenues that end up in this round about !
In intersections you have to learn to be patient, it’s likely to be disorganized. In the US and Australia, people wait until the intersection is clear before they move forward and cross the intersection, even if the light was green. Not here. As soon as the light was about to change to red (or probably already changed to red), everyone pushes into the intersection and consequently blocks everyone else who now has a green light, resulting in a huge honking and cursing mess. There doesn’t seem to be a rule that the intersection has to be clear before one enters it, as we have at least in California.

Many Paris avenues now have bus lanes that could be used by buses and taxis. No private passenger cars or motorcycles should be on these lanes. But, if motor cyclists have no qualm of riding on the sidewalk, you can bet they have no qualm whatsoever zipping in the restricted bus lanes.
Streets found in older quarters of Paris tend to be narrow (just wide enough for one car, eg. in Le Marais or in Montmartre).Consequently, they tend to be one way and you may have to circle around to get anywhere. Be careful on these narrow streets as, in many of them, bicycles are allowed to go against the (car) trafic.

As many have said, best to see Paris on foot, or by bus or by métro….or of course by the wonderful Velib (hired) bicycles that could be found everywhere in Paris (see my entry on Velib).